Don't Leave Me
by Master-Magician
Summary: Piper eagerly awaits Nathaniel's return from the Institute, but when he does finally come back it is not in triumphant victory as she hoped. But even in complete darkness, lights can still shine.


**Wow did this one get away from me. I originally thought I'd have trouble making 1600 words, which is usually the minimum I allow myself. But this one just flowed nonstop on its own.**

 **Enjoy.**

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"Sure you don't need any more help Sturges?"

"Nope, pretty sure I'm gonna turn in Piper. Kinda late darlin'." The mechanic wiped some oil off his hands as he tossed a couple of his tools back into the red box he carried around.

Piper groaned internally, both for only just now realizing how late it was and the fact that her primary distraction was packing it in for the day.

Sturges was good company, but more importantly, helping him around Sanctuary was keeping Piper's mind off of other thoughts. Ones that were already starting to creep back into her thoughts.

As hard as Piper tried, her gaze slowly slid over to the giant imposing frame of the teleporter she helped build. Nathaniel seemed to of had faith in the machine he assembled, and Piper had faith in him, but she had to admit thinking about it made her queasy. Virgil, the guy who gave them the designs, didn't seem to have that much belief in it.

For all they knew Nathaniel was just obliterated in the flash of light that came with the device's use a week and a half ago. That pipe that ruptured during the process of turning it on didn't inspire much confidence. He didn't even make it to the Institute. Nathaniel was never coming back...

"No." Piper snapped at herself beneath her breath. "He made it, he made it and he's coming back anytime now with son right with him." She was going to be right here to greet him and Shaun when they did.

That last thought was the exact reason why Piper had volunteered for the perimeter watch of the bridge on the edge of Sanctuary. Both as often as she was allowed and as often as her body would let her. It was the main way into the settlement, anyone entering would have to pass over it. And when Nathaniel finally did, Piper would be first to welcome the father and son back. After clubbing him upside the head for taking so long.

Seated in a chair with rifle leaning against the rough barricade, Piper prepared herself for another rough evening.

It was like this every night since Nathaniel's departure. Sleep was a pipedream no matter how hard she tried. Worry would prevent any rest or relaxation, so she put it to good use by helping around the settlement wherever she could. Sturges seemed to never have an end to his own work so it was a win-win for both.

Piper was halfway through chewing on some squirrel bits when she looked down at the food with a frown. For the longest time, her favorite food had been the crappy watered down Diamond City noodles. If Takashi's noodles were compared to most other foods, the robot was a culinary master. When everything tasted like garbage, the not-so-like-garbage food was delicious.

That was until Piper had a taste of Nathaniel's cooking for the first time. She had been skeptical back when he made something for them both shortly after they met. Nathaniel said her eyes lit up like stars when she took the first bite. Thankfully, she had used the food to mask her blush. But could you blame her? The guy made bloatfly taste good for god's sake!

When asked how he knew how to cook so well, he waved her off with a short explanation about his days in the army. "The standard rations sucked, so we had to get creative. Even after, Nora couldn't cook to save her life. It was part of why we got Codsworth. Now he could cook let me tell you."

After uttering the second part, Nathaniel had taken on a sad smile. It felt like a punch straight to Piper's gut knowing she brought up the bad memories of his wife's death. She would have loved to take the question back but it was too late for that.

Now here Piper sat, trying to once again eat trashy food. The squirrel bits might as well have been ash in her mouth from how they tasted. She wanted badly to hate Nathaniel for ruining normal food for her, but she knew she couldn't. The great food was but another entry on the growing list of why she stuck with the man in the search for his son.

It occurred to her that this last week and change was the first time she spent any extended time away from Nathaniel's side. After he arrived in Diamond City, he was almost completely lost. But he did follow her up on the request for an interview. He didn't know where else to go from what he said. It was Piper who directed him to Nick Valentine for help. To her shock, he did accept her deal about coming with him and watching his back.

Ever since the pair had been near inseparable. Whether it was the search for Kellogg, killing said Kellogg, a trek into the glowing sea, taking on a courser, Piper was right next to him every step of the journey. But stepping through the teleporter, going into the heart of the Institute, was one stage of the quest she could not follow.

And it was killing her.

Piper meant it when she said she'd watch out for him no matter where they went. When their plan to infiltrate the Institute was first drawn up, Piper had every intention of accompanying him in through the machine. It wasn't until they finished building it and powered it up, did they discover Virgil's plan only factored in a single individual. The system simply couldn't handle two people while hijacking the signal from the Institute.

Piper had been so desperate to go along, she asked if it would work if they just hugged really tightly. Maybe then they would count as a single person, albeit a large one.

To Nathaniel it may have sounded like she was joking, Piper had thrown in a small laugh to hide how she really felt. She hadn't been in her right mind the moment she found out Nathaniel was being forced to go alone. The question had been past her lips before she actually thought it through, so she added the laugh also without thinking. Not for the first time, Piper was cursing that Nathaniel could make her so flustered without actually trying. She liked to think she hid her embarrassment and desperation well. If Nathaniel saw through her, he didn't show it.

"As fun as that would be, and as much as I'd like you there, best not take the risk." Nathaniel had said while stepping on the platform. "I promise, I'll be right back. I'm sure Shaun will love you."

Piper's last glimpse of Nathaniel had been a small wave before the light took him away.

'I'm sure Shaun will love you', the words rattled around in Piper's head. She certainly was curious about who the boy was, but it was how Nathaniel said it that made Piper think twice. He was actually going to introduce her to his young son. In the world of the Commonwealth, trust was in short supply. The fact that Nathaniel trusted her enough to let her meet Shaun spoke volumes about his opinion on the woman.

The memory of the day made Piper remember that not only was she worried about Nathaniel, she was extremely nervous about the reunion. What would Shaun think of her? Was he anything like his dad? Would he see her like most other people did? She needed to make a good first impression on Nathaniel's son.

"Wait a second..." Piper mumbled to herself. "Why is it so important what Shaun thinks of me?"

The universe gave Piper an answer in the form of a blinding illumination less than ten feet away.

The reporter was so startled she fell out of the chair she was in with a yelp. Thinking they were under attack, she snatched up her rifle and dove behind the barricade. After several heartbeats, she jumped up ready to repel whatever was coming at them... only to stop cold when she saw who it was.

"Ugh... never getting used to that." A heavily breathing, but otherwise completely unharmed Nathaniel stood there in the middle of the bridge hunched over with hands on his knees.

"BLUE!" Piper was so shocked, her body moved and left her mind in the dust. The rifle fell to the ground with a soft thump while Piper scrambled over the barrier, not realizing it would be faster to just go around. But her thoughts had been consumed with a single overriding directive- get to Nathaniel.

Nathaniel had just recovered from whatever it was had him doubled over when Piper came running at him at a full sprint. He was completely unprepared for when the woman crashed into him, throwing her arms around him. Nathaniel was only able to make sure when they fell, he would hit the ground first to break her fall.

"You're back. You're back." Piper repeated the phrase over and over, tightening her arms involuntary. The two had shared a couple hugs, but none that lasted remotely this long. Piper would be mortified were it not for the cleansing relief she was feeling right now. All thoughts of striking Nathaniel for making her worry had already vanished.

"Piper, air." Nathaniel wheezed.

"Sorry." Piper loosened her arms, but didn't let go at first. Right about then, her mind caught back up with her body's actions. They were laying on the decrepit bridge just on the edge of Sanctuary, Nathaniel on the ground with Piper on top of him, her arms encircling his neck while his own rested on Piper's hips.

Piper's skin didn't just warm, it burned hotter than a blast furnace.

Piper was frozen in place, her limbs wouldn't respond to the commands to move. So much for her first impression for Shaun.

Wait a second...

"Where's Shaun?" Piper regretted the question the instant she saw the look on Nathaniel's face.

Piper had seen Nathaniel angry, seen him sad, seen him determined. But the look in his eyes now was something Piper had never seen. Nathaniel was always solid as a rock, it was something Piper had learned to count on. When the bullets were flying, the ghouls were swarming, or the super mutants were charging, Nathaniel held his composure.

Looking into his dark orbs, Piper saw that something had finally done to Nathaniel what she thought nothing in this world could ever have a hope of doing.

Break him.

Piper was speechless, not having a clue what to say in response to Nathaniel's silence. With words having failed, she switched tactics. Taking the man by the hand, Piper pulled him to his feet. Nathaniel's steps were uneasy and heavy as she attempted to lead him back into the settlement, but he wasn't interested. Opting instead to collapse with his back to the barricade Piper was sitting on the opposite side of earlier.

Nathaniel didn't want to go back to his place here in Sanctuary. Piper could work with that, if he didn't want to go back she couldn't force him. When he was ready to talk, she was going to be right here ready for him. With that in mind, she took a seat with her back against the reinforced pile of wood and metal.

It was almost funny, a story was to be found here and Piper's insatiable curiosity was already running at full power. Had it been anyone else, Piper would be relentlessly asking questions and taking notes to discover the mystery. But not Nathaniel, no, for him she would wait patiently for him to open to her. And Piper was not a woman known for her patience.

"Shaun's not coming home." Nathaniel finally spoke after what felt like hours of silence.

"Is he..." Piper swallowed hard, unable to finish the sentence.

"No, he's still alive and kicking." Nathaniel sounded so defeated then that Piper wanted nothing more than to reach over to hold him and never let go.

Nathaniel suddenly burst into laughter, but it was hollow and empty, nothing like the cheerful sound Piper had taken so much for granted before today. "I actually thought he was ten years old. I told myself, its only ten years. We can make up for all that lost time once I find him. Shouldn't have gotten my hopes up, he isn't ten years old. He's in his late sixties."

Piper muffled her gasp of horror with her hand. That means Shaun was now older than Nathaniel. Piper couldn't imagine how he must be feeling after learning that. He missed not only Shaun's early childhood, he missed almost his entire life.

"And that's the good news." Nathaniel chuckled bitterly. "Now he's the head honcho of the Institute. Like the punch line of some bad joke."

Piper's heart broke slightly hearing the raw pain in the man's words. To know your son was not only taken by the boogeyman of the Commonwealth, but is now their leader? Piper wasn't sure which was worse, knowing that your chief enemy in this new world was led by your own son, or knowing that to go up against them meant having to be on opposing sides to literally the last living remnant of your family.

Piper didn't hesitate this time, she reached out and took Nathaniel's hand in hers. She said nothing, words were far too cheap for a time like this. So in place of that she gave a gentle squeeze.

Nathaniel seemed not to notice as he continued, his eyes alternating between staring off into space or down at the dirt. "He wants me to join them, the Institute. I even did a couple jobs for them here on the surface at a favor to Shaun."

Certainly horrified at the thought of what work he could have done for the Institute, Piper shoved that thought down. If it was something really bad, Nathaniel would have turned it down. But it asked by his own son... no, he wouldn't compromise his morals even then. Piper just had to keep telling herself that.

"I realized a few things down there." Nathaniel suddenly turned to look over at Piper. "Have you heard of Libertalia?"

Despite being caught off guard at the topic change and attention, Piper recovered fast. "Y...Yeah. Big raider gang in a bunch of barely floating ships and docks. Nasty customers."

Nathaniel scoffed with the tiniest of smirks. "Not anymore. Me and an Institute courser killed everyone there."

"All of them?" Piper was shocked. Last she heard, that gang numbered at least thirty, maybe more. But she had seen a courser in action. One of them partnered with Nathaniel? That matchup was horrifying, it made deathclaws look like those fluffy white animals in old pre-war books by comparison.

"All of them." Nathaniel nodded in affirmation. "But they weren't the objective, their leader was. Guy named Gabriel. The rest of them were just in the way, X6-88 would have been just as alright with taking Gabriel only but we had to cut through all of them."

"Why one person? Just to replace him with a synth?" Piper tried, tried and failed, to keep the anger from her voice. It sounded like a typical Institute snatch and replace job. The kind people in the Commonwealth were scared to death of.

Nathaniel made a motion with his hand. "Reverse, Gabriel was a synth. The Institute has a whole department, the SRB, whose job is to catch runaway synths and bring them back. I only agreed to come along after finding out it was a raider gang we were targeting."

Now that sounded more like the Nathaniel Piper knew and missed so much. But something nagged at her still. "How did you know Gabriel was a synth? Surely you didn't just take the Institute at its word?"

"Nope, I had my doubts the whole way. If it came down to it, I was going to kill Gabriel myself it needed. One less raider in the world makes everything better. But just before we reached the top of Libertalia, the courser gave me the shutdown code for Gabriel. Sure enough, right after I said it he just dropped like a sack of bricks."

"You made the Commonwealth a better place Blue." Piper squeezed his hand a little tighter. "As crazy as it is, the Institute helped you do it." Taking out a camp of raiders was something she and Nathaniel had done several times. Libertalia was in a sense no different. Only Nathaniel had used Institute backup instead of her or the Minutemen. "You used their help, and they used yours. Imagine all the lives you probably saved by taking them out."

"I know, but now I see a few things clearly. How do you think Gabriel got there at Libertalia?" Nathaniel again looked at her but Piper's words failed her yet again. All she could muster was a shrug.

"The Railroad, the Railroad put him there. I know they didn't mean to but the facts are there. How many of the synths do they rescue do you think go on to become peaceful farmers and settlers? There's no telling how many go on to become killers and monsters just as bad as any other raiders. I'm against slavery as much as the next guy, but the Railroad is doing damage and not even noticing it. Or not wanting to notice it, hard to tell."

It was something Piper never saw before this. New face and new identity, that was how the Railroad helped the synths they saved. But Nathaniel was right, how many times had a Gabriel been created? The thought was more than a little chilling.

"Then came Bunker Hill." Nathaniel's voice trembled, actually trembled. Alarms were starting to blare in Piper's thoughts now. Whatever happened there was eating him alive inside.

Feeling the need to do something, Piper took his hand in both hers and pulled it over to her own lap. She waited several moments for him to pull it back but he never did. Feeling a little emboldened, Piper held her grip with one hand, while her other's fingertips slowly ran over the skin of the back of his hand.

"Don't hold it in, I'm here if you'll just stop resisting." She didn't voice it, but Piper was begging him to talk to her.

"Another job for the Institute." Nathaniel began. " A group of synths being held in a shelter under Bunker Hill, protected by the Railroad."

Piper was growing sick to her stomach, already having a feeling where this might be going.

"Just like the last one, get the courser, a different one this time, to the group and he would teleport them and himself back to the Institute. But... these weren't raiders, these synths didn't even have new memories yet. They knew full well what was coming for them, what they were going to be forced to go back to."

Piper held his hand tighter, urging him to continue his tale while ignoring the bile rising in her throat.

"We had a plan, we could sneak in and past the Railroad agents. We could avoid a fight and still get through without killing anyone."

Piper wanted to say 'except those you were taking back to hell' but she bit her tongue into silence.

"Welcome to the Commonwealth, plan went to hell in a handbasket almost instantly. Brotherhood vertibirds showed up just as we were about to move. We could have used the fight as cover to get through, but the courser disagreed. Next thing I know, he goes 'the plan has changed' and is calling in reinforcements. Synths, Brotherhood of Steel soldiers, and Railroad agents, a three sided battle to the death with civilians in the crossfire. And you know the crazy part?"

Piper shook her head.

"Not a single one fired on me. Maybe they were too distracted, but I think they all thought I was on their side. I was a friendly who just happened to be in the neighborhood." Nathaniel let loose another empty laugh. "Eh, kinda funny."

No it wasn't, at least not if Piper had anything to say about it. She knew how Nathaniel felt about this. He had done work for and knew people from at least two thirds of these factions. He had to watch as some of his own friends and allies shot and killed each other and he could do nothing but avoid stray bullets.

"I pretended to fire at everyone, missing on purpose, but the courser didn't share that sentiment. Eventually we got through and found the shelter under Bunker Hill. It was there we found the synths we were sent to retrieve." Nathaniel stopped his story for a long moment. "There was a whole group this time. As soon as they saw me and the courser, they were so scared. They begged us not to take them back, one even tried to bribe me with a few caps."

Piper laced her fingers with his and continued tracing the lines in his skin with her fingertips. Almost hoping Nathaniel wouldn't finish. As much as she wanted to know what happened, the possibility of him doing...

"The courser never even had the chance to fight back when I shot him in the back of the head. They might be tough, but not when you get the drop on them."

Piper's eyebrows shot up. She definitely hoped that was what he would say but she hadn't dared to let it go past a tiny sliver of belief. Shaun led the Institute now, Nathaniel's own son and last surviving family. If Nathaniel had accepted the offer and joined up with the Institute permanently, nobody in the world, Piper included, would have been able to blame him.

Were their roles reversed, with Piper in his shoes and Nat in charge of the Institute, Piper didn't think she would be able to tell her sister no if offered the same deal.

"I'm going to crush them Piper." Nathaniel snarled, rage having replaced his melancholy. "Every last one for what they did. A monster now wears my son's face, my little boy died years ago."

"I'm with you Blue." Piper said it once again without thinking, but it didn't matter. It was how she felt.

"It won't be enough. We'll need help. But I'm not sure I want anyone's help." Nathaniel's face twisted into a fierce scowl. "The Brotherhood? A bunch of xenophobic self-righteous bigots that want to destroy or take everything that isn't theirs. The Railroad? They can't even tell when they're screwing up, and they don't even help the regular people. If you're a synth sure they'd jump to your defense, but a settler? Nope."

Piper almost had to do a double take, it was unlike Nathaniel to just verbally rip apart their allies. But the man had a point, she always had that thought about the brotherhood but after hearing about his first mission with the Institute, Piper saw that the Railroad wasn't as innocent as she previously believed.

It wouldn't be so bad if they followed up on the people they freed, but they didn't. The Railroad helped them run away but after that washed their hands of the situation.

It wasn't like both factions weren't without their better sides, but that didn't erase their darker parts. Shades of gray, that was the best way to put it. It was the way of life, there was no black and white anywhere.

"I'd use the Minutemen but we don't have the manpower or tech to face the Institute." Nathaniel punched the ground with his free hand. "We need the Railroad or brotherhood whether I like it or not."

"Hey, we can think on that later." Piper had finally had enough. It made her heart ache seeing the man she idolized so much in such a state. "Why don't we just get you home so you can get some rest then we can think our way through this tomorrow okay?"

At first Nathaniel didn't respond, just let his eyes stare off into space. "This place isn't home. Once the Institute is defeated, when Shaun is... dead, then I'll go home."

Something in Nathaniel's words made Piper's blood turn to ice. She knew exactly what he really meant when he said he'd 'go home'.

"NO!" Piper really needed to work on her body to mind filter. Maybe then she wouldn't do somewhat crazy stuff without thinking. Like right now how she'd jumped up in front of Nathaniel to grab him by the lapels of his coat, moving so that she was straddling him in the process. Perhaps drastic action was required right now.

Tightening her grip on the man's coat, Piper willed her body to still but even then she was shaking. Eyes already starting to well up with unshed tears.

"No." Piper repeated, tilting her head down so that her hair curtained her face from view. She didn't want Nathaniel to see her fall apart like this. Not that she would have minded, but not when he was so broken himself. She needed to be strong for his sake.

"Piper..." Nathaniel began but was cut off.

"You don't get to just give up." Piper pulled him by his coat so that her eyes could bore into his own. "You made me feel wanted when all I had was Nat. You," Piper shook him gently, "are one of the only people actually trying to fix things around here when everyone just walks away."

Piper's voice was beginning to break now. She struggled to hold in her tears but one defiant one had already slid down her cheek. More were threatening to follow.

"Piper you're..."

"Shut up!" Piper barked. "Who was the one who fought a deathclaw using nothing but a suit of power armor just to save my worthless life?"

"Me but..."

"That's right. And how many people have we met would be willing to do that?"

"I don't..."

"Nobody!" One of Piper's hands moved over Nathaniel's chest to the area over his heart. "Nobody has a heart this big. We live in a world of unnatural terrors and equally nasty people, and the greatest thing to ever happen to the Commonwealth, to my life, wasn't even born in this time."

"I'm not..."

"I said shut up!" Piper's fingers had absentmindedly traveled up further to cup his cheeks in her hands. "If you go, I don't think I could take it. A world without you is one I don't want to imagine."

Reining in the tears was a utter lost cause now, the drops of moisture running in rivers down her dirt smeared cheeks.

"Nathaniel..." Piper never used his full name. Since day one it was always Blue, her own little nickname for the man. "I need you to keep fighting, even after we win against the Institute. Please... don't leave me."

It was never a question of if they could beat the Institute. With Nathaniel at the helm, they would fight and they would win, it was only a question of when Nathaniel could plant the final nail in the coffin. Piper would be happy to pass him the nail and hammer.

"I need you to... to..." Piper's speech trailed off as her senses registered several things all at the same time. The first being that she was still straddling Nathaniel's lap, their bodies so close together that Piper could feel the warmth radiating from him. The second was the intimate way she cradled his head in ink smudged hands. Piper didn't think they had ever been this close before, baring a couple half second hugs but even those were rare.

The thing really getting to Piper was the close proximity of their faces. She leaned in close so she could make Nathaniel listen, their foreheads nearly touching, their breaths mingling into one. Not once in her life had Piper been this close to another person save her sister.

Piper knew she should pull away, but she was too captivated by Nathaniel's eyes. Her body wouldn't budge no matter how strong the command her brain sent. She was firmly rooted in place.

Kiss him.

There was no telling where that thought came from, but the urge was unmistakable. Piper's gaze trailed down to Nathaniel's chapped lips for a fraction of a second before returning to his eyes.

It's wrong, it's wrong, he's still grieving for his wife. Piper screamed in her own thoughts but again her body wouldn't listen. She was already leaning forward before she could stop herself.

At the last possible second, Piper managed to regain a little self-control and stopped before their lips could touch. But stopping was all she could do, Piper's body refused to pull away. The best she could hope for was that he wouldn't be too mad at her slip of...

All rational thought fled Piper's body when Nathaniel closed the minuscule space between them, sealing their lips in a soft kiss.

Knowing full well she wasn't going to be able to stop herself anymore, so she at last just gave in. Her body pushed forward until they were flush together, lips mashed against one another's. Arms wrapping tightly around Nathaniel's neck while her finger's tangled themselves in his hair.

The kiss was sloppy and completely unromantic. Too much teeth, too much tongue, too rough, she hadn't fully stopped crying. Piper's inexperience was evident, she hadn't a clue what she was doing. Not the first kiss of her life like she would have dreamed. But such was life.

One of Nathaniel's hands had slipped beneath her red coat to rest on her hip at first. Then it slid up her back, the fingertips leaving a warm trail through her thin shirt that made her shiver. Between that and the feel of his other hand's fingers dancing across the flesh of her neck was almost too much for her. Thankfully, she only let loose a soft moan instead of fainting in Nathaniel's arms.

After they parted, Piper didn't know if the lightheadedness was from lack of oxygen, or from sensory overload of the kiss itself. Either way she was dizzy, but didn't want to let go of Nathaniel quite yet. Hell, she never wanted to let go.

"I... I..." Piper struggled for both words and air, her lips still brushing Nathaniel's.

"Shut up." Nathaniel repeated Piper's own order before pressing his lips back to hers once more.

Piper was happy to oblige.

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 **Now this will probably be my last Fallout story, I'm out of ideas. So unless I get sudden inspiration, or suggestions, this is it for me ladies and gentlemen. But please let me know how I did here.**


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